The Leek: The Green Scare

Jeffrey Vest has been subject to accusation for being a leprechaun. Investigations at Lawrence North have commenced and are seeking to bring out the truth.

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The Leek: The Green Scare

Sophie Bradburn, Staff Member

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As St. Patricks day nears Lawrence North High School, people start to wear their green colored clothes and flash off their gold. It is also the time for the creatures, humans call “leprechauns”, to come out of hiding and venture into the world to celebrate their beloved holiday. There have been sightings in Ohio of leprechauns taking Lucky Charms cereal off of shelves and sightings in Kentucky of them taking gold items from people’s homes. Since those incidents, people are starting to suspect leprechauns within their own communities.

Now the speculation has come to Lawrence North, where students and staff members are suspicious of their fellow teacher and colleague, Jeffrey Vest. Vest is one of the only teachers at Lawrence North that has red hair. During the month of March when it is close to St. Patrick’s day, he sometimes dresses up in a typical leprechaun uniform consisting of a green suit, matching top hat, and a green hanky in pocket. It is also said that Vest stashes gold around his classroom. These actions have caused questioning and investigations to begin.

Andrew Schroeder is an english teacher at Lawrence North and a coworker with Vest. Schroeder is one of the main teachers that believes that Vest could be a leprechaun. He is also a staff member in the group of people that lead the speculation. Schroeder said that he has seen some questionable things that Vest has done when he visited his classroom.

“I believe that Vest is secretly a leprechaun. I have seen him, pieces of gold in hand, walking around his classroom hiding things in small places. He didn’t notice me, but I swear I saw it happen,” Schroeder said.

To see whether he was right or not, investigators from the FBI building around the Castleton area came to the high school to question Vest on whether or not he is lying about what his identity as a leprechaun. They came during the weekend, so they wouldn’t disrupt classes and create chaos with the rest of the students and faculty members. One investigator on the case was Derek Williams. Williams has worked with the FBI for around seven years and said he’s never seen a case like this before.

“This is a very interesting and unusual case that we’re dealing with. Vest to me doesn’t seem suspicious but he does do some questionable stuff. I can see how people see him as this leprechaun but there is no solid evidence since there aren’t any security cameras in classrooms,” Williams said.

With all the allegations towards Vest, people have started to harass him and it is starting to take a toll. Schroeder says that he sees Vest lock himself in his room more instead of his normal roaming around the halls and that he doesn’t scream as much. As a part of the investigation, Williams had someone look over Vest for a day in his classroom, outside of school, and Williams said that he was being secretive. Although, Vest says that wasn’t the case and that he feels offended about the whole situation.

“I was simply putting things into folders on my desktop and moving things around my room. It is ridiculous to think that people believe I’m actually a leprechaun. It’s offensive! No one respects me anymore and I’ve been here for 10+ years. The situation is outrageous,” said Vest.

Since Vest’s opinion was voiced to the media, teachers and students have acknowledged the insensitivity of their actions and dropped the allegations of him being a leprechaun. The FBI case was discontinued, and the harassment has stopped thus bringing peace back to Lawrence North.

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